Cancer Schmancer

I did two frivolous things today. The first was to buy an iPod, which enables me to carry around my entire collection of music in a container about the size of a pack of cards. To celebrate, I walked all three dogs separately. It was a nice day anyway and the added dimension of great tunes to move to just made it a complete pleasure. I'm hoping this is the answer to my need for more exercise.

The second thing was to go to a Look Good, Feel Better class at Wellspring. It is essentially a makeup class, complete with loads of products donated by major companies, followed by a wig demonstration. There were several volunteers on hand and we all had a giggle or two.

My current reading includes "Cancer as a Turning Point" by Lawrence LeShan. He advises me to do more of what turns me on and less of what turns me off. Hence the iPod purchase -- I love music to dance to, stitch to, walk and run to. The makeup class would not have made it to my list of what turns me on, but I had no trouble enjoying it. It was the playfulness of it that appealed, the "just because I can" factor.

Once again, I am grateful to all the people who are helping people living with cancer, all those big companies that we often criticize for one thing or another, but who think it's a good thing to ship their stuff to cancer centres all over the place so people like me can feel better. And I did.

Posted by lynda at 10:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

My cold symptoms seem to have vanished. Just in time for an excellent gardening day! I had two garden angels with me today, Polly and Sally, who did not hesitate to pitch in for raking compost and transplanting a couple of shrubs that needed new homes.
This morning's relaxation class was very exciting. I discovered that two women I know from the class will be joining me at the second level of the Healing Journey program starting in May. Furthermore, another woman attending today's class was among those in the study I mentioned in a previous post, in which 22 people with terminal cancer were followed and evaluated according to how involved they became with self-healing activities. I felt surrounded by people enthusiastically dedicated to life.

Posted by lynda at 05:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Germs finally caught up with me yesterday (we think they're from Bob) and I am trying to fend off a cold. Bob had it pretty severely on the weekend: sore throat, sneezing, coughing, etc. So far, I just have that itchy feeling in my throat and a headache now and then, not enough symptoms to interfere with most things. Of course, this is my least favourite time to get it because my immune system is at its lowest, but perhaps it will spur those little white cells to multiply faster. I saw a picture of the white cells I need lots of at yesterday's Healing Journey session. The idea is to visualize in some meaningful way the action of the white cells against the cancer cells, so that you can encourage your own healing.
Mom went home yesterday to count her own daffodils and next time she is back we will be heading south to see Claire's graduation.

Posted by lynda at 08:08 AM | Permalink

When I spoke with my case manager, Heidi, on Chemo day, she was commenting about how people often think that after cancer treatment, you can then move on with your life. She said that, because it is such a life-changing event, and because of the constant possibility of recurrence, it is more accurate to think about "navigating" through your new life of living with cancer. I like that. It matches my feeling of needing new navigational skills, new life skills really.
Some of those skills I am beginning to get from the Healing Journey course that I went to yesterday and the Journaling class I went to today. Both are designed to prompt me to evaluate carefully the way I want to live from now on.

Posted by lynda at 08:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Mom came with me today as primary caregiver and excellent conversationalist for my third chemo treatment, giving Bob a well-deserved break. It was drizzling rain, but not too cold. All went as planned, but it took most of the day. Mind you, we took time to walk over to Baldwin Street for our Chinese bakery nosh, an essential ritual for this outing. As before, I was feeling good going into the treatment and am still fine now, albeit tired. My white blood cell count is low, as expected, but still at an acceptable point. Three more treatments to do -- just about halfway there!

Posted by lynda at 07:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

This morning I went to the first of four sessions of The Healing Journey, Introduction, run by an esteemed psychologist at Princess Margaret Hospital for cancer patients and caregivers. Its premise is that one can harness the mind in various ways to enable and encourage physical healing, and to enhance quality of life. The most compelling piece of information I got today is the results of a study done with 22 people who took the program ten years ago. All were terminally ill with metastatic cancer; all were given about a year to live. The study looked at the level of involvement in their own healing for each person, through the progam and other activities. All outlived their prognosis; the most involved lived much longer and two are still alive today. Sounds like a good bet to me.
As elsewhere, I also learned about what other people are facing, some of them inoperable or untreatable cancers, or cancer that has returned after years of remission. Once again, I count my blessings and come home to count the crocuses in my front garden.

Posted by lynda at 01:50 PM | Permalink

One of the little known side effects of my cancer treatment is the klutz effect: dropping things, fuzzy thinking, tripping over cracks in the sidewalk. I experienced the latter yesterday when I took a flying leap into the parking lot just outside the post office. A kind person helped me up and once I deduced I had only suffered a skinned knee, I was on my way again. I guess it's part of the chronic fatigue because I really wasn't this clumsy before. No, really!
Just one week to go until my next chemo treatment. so my task this week is to build my white blood cell count. Outside of minimizing stress, anybody know how to do that?

Posted by lynda at 08:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)